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| "I need a fancy coffin with a gas BBQ inside. Price is no object." |
But where to get such a custom coffin? Bubba has it all figured out. A financial analyst, Ebenezer Mortician who often consults for OM, made the mistake of mentioning to Bubba that he makes custom coffins for the rich and famous.
About Mortician
Ebenezer Mortician was born in a small town in Connecticut. His dad and his granddad (all his father's descendants) were in the funeral business. They owned a funeral home and made their living in burying the dead. They also had a side business (like a body shop next door to the funeral home) where they made coffins.
Ebenezer's mom worked as a maid in one of the affluent neighborhoods. The family she worked for was the wealthiest in Connecticut. She used to take little Ebenezer with her to work sometimes. She used to give him a rag and tell him to dust the counter tops and be careful not to break anything.
Sometimes he went to work with his dad and helped in embalming the dead and hovered in the background during a funeral to watch the ghosts come out of the corpses.
Ebenezer vowed that one day he was going to be rich like the family that his mom worked for.
So, he worked very hard in school and earned a scholarship to Yale where he majored in Finance and Business Management.
When he was done with school he applied for an internship program at a bank on Wall Street in NYC. From there he learned everything about investing and making money. With a lot of hard work, no play, and his diligence in making money he became very wealthy.
He decided not to let his ancestor's business die (no pun intended!) since he had a lot of fond memories in the mortuaries. So, he expanded the funeral home business to a chain. Changed the standard coffin making to a unique line of custom made coffins for the wealthy. Each coffin was jewel encrusted and gold plated according to the client's specifications. For example, one client didn't want to leave his money to his family, so in his will, he asked that they liquidate all his assets and spend all the money on the coffin (so he can take it with him). That's Ebenezer's specialty.
